WELCOME

Among those of us who care deeply for and about people with developmental disabilities, I hope to hear emerge a new voice, ours, rising together for the benefit of all, harmonizing with reason, respect and hope, and transcending divisions, giving birth to a new era of creative cooperation.

Toward this potential, DD EXCHANGE is for conversation, civil sounding off, sharing of stories, experience, information, resources, and inspiration, giving and receiving support, and creative problem solving.


Finding Your Way Around

TO SEE OTHER'S INPUT: below each post on the right, click "links to this post;" or in the left side column, under "Labels," click the discussion link that interests you.

If there is no comment box below the post, click on
"# comments." It should open one.

TO CONTRIBUTE: add comments to posts in comment boxes &/or submit an article. Comments may also be sent for posting on your behalf. Email address as follows:

EMAIL: ddexchanges@gmail.com

MAILING LIST: add or remove name:
send request to email address, above.

WEB LINKS: to access other websites of interest, in the list to the right, just click on the underlined name.

FOLLOWERS: interested people, websites, organizations, businesses
who follow our discussions & choose to be public about their support.
Become a follower. Public support is a good thing!




Sunday, September 24, 2017

SOMETIMES "TWO" - SOMETIMES "TWENTY THREE"

This story came to me in an email today.

BTW:  I love these people: Thomas for his innocence and  fresh, enthusiastic love of life and  his very special parents for nurturing and supporting him exactly where he is at all times, never pushing him to be more than he is, but always helping him to learn what he wants to learn,  and do what he wants to do within the limits of safety and consideration of others.

The story: by Cheryl Felak
"This afternoon, when  Thomas was having an absolute screaming fit about making a choice I was asking him to make, I said "you're acting like a two-year-old." When he stated the choice that he wanted, he would talk in his normal voice and be very calm, but when I tried to convince him to choose the choice I wanted him to make, he would start to scream again like a two-year-old and jump up-and-down. This was on the sidewalk, walking home after church and, of course, people would turn around and look at him and smile because most of the people there know  him, but they haven't seen him tantrum like that because we do try to really help him stay under control, and keep his voice down while in church .

During the tantrum, I asked him, "How old are you?"  He answered,  "two."  A couple minutes later, when he was really calm, I asked him how  old he was -  he said,  "23." His father and I started cracking up because of the correspondence we've had with somebody over acting like a two-year-old and mental age recently.

Later this evening, I was riding in the car with him  and we were talking and I recorded just a tad bit of the conversation we had and I hope you can download it or hear it somehow - I think you might get a kick out of it. It doesn't seem like it hurts Thomas' feelings at all to be called a two-year-old."
[End of story]  

This blog format doesn't support audio, so I've transcribed the clip in the email.  Mom's voice is always animated with a tone of non-judgemental curiosity.  Thomas' responses are superquick with a tone of matter-of-factness.  No shame.  No upset.  Just delightful self-acceptance and sharing of himself.

 Audio clip, transcribed:
Mom: " Thomas, you know when you get really upset and you start to scream?   You know that?"

Thomas: "Yeah." 
"

Mom: "How old are you, then? 

Thomas: "Two." 

Mom: Two?  How old  are you now? "

 Thomas: "23"   

Mom: "But if you have a tantrum, how old are you? "  

 Thomas: "Two." 

Mom: "When you get really mad because things aren't going your way? And you start screamin'?  
 

Thomas: "Yeah?"

Mom: "How old are you?" 

Thomas: "Two."


Mom: "OK.

How old are you right now?" 

Thomas:  "23"

 [End of audio clip.]

It just goes to show that one size does not fit all!  Great gratitude to this Mom for sharing their story!